Slick

I was in a suburb of Los Angeles that will remain unnamed. If I called it out, I might have a mob outside my mobile home with pitchforks and torches. Yes, I do live in a trailer park, I am white, but I do keep it neat most of the time. Anyway, I was eating at a fast food restaurant, when a big man came in, dressed in a white shirt, jeans and cowboy boots. He had a ID badge hanging around his neck. He swaggered up to the woman behind the counter, and instead of ordering, started asking her questions about the drains.

“I'm from the city, and it's been reported that your grease drains are draining to the ocean. Need a way to stop that from happening. You wouldn't know anything about that, would you? Well, can I come back there and look at your drains?” (All in one breath)

The employee said, “I know we have grease traps, not drains. What are you talking about?”

“Well, if I can come back there, I can show you.”

Incredulous, she replied, “Well, you'll have to talk to the owner about that.”

“But, but, there will be a huge fine. In fact, if you give me $100, I'll make sure no one knows about it.”

“There's no problem with our grease traps, as we have someone come by and clean them out. As for our drains, we haven't seen any clogs or odors or anything. I'm not gonna give you anything. Do you have a number I can call to verify who you are?”

Ignoring her, he blustered, “Well, I was outside and I noticed something with your outlet pipe, so I need to look at that too. It'll be $100 to inspect it.”

I'm sitting there drinking my coffee, listening to this exchange. In an effort to intimidate the woman, he then got on his cellphone and started talking about putting in a report. But, she wrote down the owner's number and handed it to him.

“Call the owner and set it up with him. I don't have that responsibility. Who are you with again?” She squinted trying to read his badge, but he turned around and kept talking on his phone. Finally, the man left in a hurry.

Definitely a small time con man and least likely to succeed.